My daughter just attended her first big girl homecoming dance. It was at Chicago's Field Museum and the cost was $45, plus dress and accessories. She went with a group of freshman gal pals and had a blast. Dad got the immediate taxi backseat conversation review on the way home from the party because mom could not stay up that late. The highlights - they had fun, wanted to go to the next dance and felt the admission cost was really only worth $20 max.
The next morning my daughter and I were driving downtown and she spilled more details during our windshield time. I heard about the risque dresses, grinding and upper class girls pulling out flasks in the bathroom. All I could think was... how do I ask questions and not shut down her authentic sharing? (big gulp) So, I began asking about the inappropriate dresses and if she thought the gals wearing them had any clothing boundaries. Then, I asked her if she thought the girls' parents knew what their daughters were wearing and if the parents might have clothing or behavior guidelines for high school events. Humans have to have a logic or moral base for actions(Judeo-Christian, or otherwise); however, many teens and parents simply seem not to have any solid baseline these days. They simply go with the flow of what everyone else is doing because it is popular or has become "normal" this week. I own this struggle myself in a constantly-changing culture... normal does seem different every day.
I think the car chat went pretty well... not that I liked what she was telling me; or, the fact that only the principal and hired security guards were the chaperones at the event - what? And, I'm sure there will be even more challenging conversation processing to come with this hormone-ridden high school season. I'd love to hear any of your successful and loving input!